Just the crazy dazes!

low lessons of life

Sat, 15 May 2010 23:19:12 -0500

My life has not been my own for a few months. I have been blessed with unusually good health, strength and stamina to perform above and beyond with helping hands. Both my daughters experienced premature labor, and other health issues. I’m happy to say after months of worry, I have two tiny, but healthy granddaughters born within two weeks of each other. Both early, but with medicine to mature the babies’ lungs and an astute OB-Gyn to manage their care, all went well. We are amazed and grateful.
One thing that caught my attention was the protocol to take the premies’ blood glucose three separate times. The first grand-daughter’s bg’s were in the 50’s and 60’s. The second grand-daughter’s bg’s were in the low 70’s. It is a standard test for premature babies. Who knew that premature baby can have problems with hypoglycemia? The treatment is to simply feed the babies or provide sugar water. It is good to know that hypoglycemia is taken very seriously even in these early hours of life.
For diabetics, particularly type 1’s, being prepared with glucose tabs or some fast acting carbohydrate is imperative! This spring I was leading two older granddaughters on their first double ride with our pony, Bob. He was frisky and tugging the whole way. (Hint: a big glucose burner) We were a half mile from the house, taking a break to search for morel mushrooms when the LOW hit. I did have my glucometer, but store glucose tabs away from the meter to keep it clean and accurate. No sweets around. I told the girls, 4 and 6 year olds, that they might have to run and tell someone to bring my diabetic supplies or sweets. Just then my older grandson came riding up on his four wheeler and went to find my bag. I patiently waited with a BG of 48. He was panicked and couldn’t find my bag (not surprising I could not remember where I’d left them with my BG’s plummeting), but brought three kinds of cookies, some candy bars and a couple juice boxes. Well done! I didn’t feel too shaky and ate two cookies for the low and one juice box for my sensor showing two arrows down or fast dropping BG’s. I decided to walk slowly with the girls back to the barn. My husband came running up wild eyed with a large piece of carrot cake and demanded I eat it. I complied. I was saved this time.
Diabetics all know the moral of the story. Carry your supplies with you at all times. No exceptions. I usually do, but didn’t. How did this happen to someone who is known as one of the most prepared people on the planet? Simple. I was having fun. I hadn’t planned for a long, lead-the-frisky-pony walk. I answered the impromptu call of the woodland trail on a beautiful spring day to make memories with my granddaughters. I forgot I had Type 1 Diabetes. Memories were made, but not the ones I wanted. T1’s all have stories and this is mine. I’m fortunate it did not involve an ambulance ride...
For the morel fans out there...when word got out morels were on our son’s new property, the search began! That day produced eight and the next cold rain-sun combo brought more. Yum!

old dog learns new tricks

Mon, 3 May 2010 08:48:56 -0500

My last blog caught me in an overwhelmed moment. We added two families totaling 10 people in our home. They are still here. I’m happy to report my youngest daughter gave birth to Evangeline Joy, 5 pounds, 12 ounces, on Wednesday 4 weeks early. All is well. And we are thrilled!
My older daughter, with the high risk pregnancy who’s family is still with us, had a doctor appointment today. She is due June 15, but will be induced 5 weeks early on May 12th. So we wait.
I am proof that you can teach an old dog new tricks. Getting and managing type 1 diabetes at 53 was the first trick. Adjusting to life’s curve balls at 57 is the second. I have to admit my diabetes self care had some hiccups when our home turned into a hotel! I’m suppose to change my pump’s infusion set every 2-3 days. I would forget and it could be 4-5 days before I remember or a low reservoir alarm rudely interrupting precious dream time. My sensor would signal to be changed at the very time I need it most. Oh well...
But enough about what was. With a big attitude adjustment I’ve been able to get meals eaten and covered with- wait for it...drum roll...the correct dose of insulin. I’ve been able to change my basal rate...finally...to match new activity levels. YES! I even changed my lancet. Whoa! It has been an adventure. My hair may not be combed and my socks might not always match, adding a few pounds, but my blood sugars are good, grandkids are fed and hugged and the dog gets let out at the right time. All is well with the world.
Diabetes is like a plane in a nose dive. The lights are flashing, the mask drops down and you place it over your face before attending to your children. You have to do your best type 1 self-management to be at peak performance. Those around you will wait and reap the rewards of your efforts.
I think I’ll head out and plant the three new bleed heart plants I bought today or make myself a lovely iced coffee with sugar free English Toffee syrup and put my feet up. ...in my dreams. I’ll push a load of laundry through!

I need juggling lessons!

Fri, 2 Apr 2010 20:29:44 -0500

Family has been on my mind lately. My parents have passed away, so even now I sometimes feel like an orphan; a little lost. I miss my folks. They were great supporters. So I am our oldest generation. I’ve been married since 1973, have raised 4 children who have given me 12 grandchildren. This spring two new grand-daughters will bless us.
We have an open home where people come and go daily. And while all our children are grown and gone, we do not have an empty nest. As I write this, we have 10 people staying with us for various lengths of time. My oldest daughter has cholestasis of pregnancy and is high risk. This is her fourth child. She will be induced at 35 wks, but until then she will stay with us. We picked up the kids from the hospital tonight and she will soon be released to come to our home. Since her dad is an OB-Gyn, they figure she is in good hands. It is not an ideal situation, but May 12 will be a good day! This will free her husband up to continue working and the kids to have a fun place to be. My daughter will be miserable and hanging on... All this and we even had friends tell us about some people they knew who’d lost their home and needed a place to stay-I had to say we were full for now...I wondered what was wrong with their house... I’m glad they think of us to help, but sometimes the answer is ‘no.’
My family would say I can do just about anything. I’ve been trying to gently break it to them that I can’t. I’ve always been up for an adventure. I have a lot of pride, so that still kicks in and I’m off and running, literally! My grandchildren are accustomed to going on adventures: hikes, bike rides, geocaching and horseback riding any free moment.
On a ‘normal‘ day I can easily spot a low and stop it cold. I check my BG’s 8-10 times a day, so not much gets past me. I have my CGMS alarms set at 70 for lows and 120 for highs. My basal goals are to have an 85 BG, but I’m more often at 95. I can multi-task with the best of them, but as I get older, I feel the challenge. So blood glucose control is also on my mind.
I’ve had T1 since June 30, 2006. I’ve learned much, but have a ways to go. Lately it has been about juggling. I’ve had some close calls when my schedule gets too crazy. I put off changing my infusion set...then end up remembering in the middle of the night. I bolus for a meal and forget to eat. I eat and forget to bolus. I take my BG and by the time I zip my case shut I’ve forgotten the number and have to restart my meter to check. I try to count/log carbs, proteins and fiber with an iPhone app to help with weight loss, only to lose track half way through the day. I get my BGs good to go on a long walk, only to have to do some emergency babysitting which involves rocking a baby. I love rocking, but it doesn’t exactly burn through the blood glucose.
Type 1 diabetics gals who have managed through childhood and are raising families or have raised families and perhaps worked a job to boot are amazing women! This is what I am learning right now, later in life. What I’ve written is no news to them! Diabetes with a routine is hard. Diabetes with chaos is, well, harder.
For now, I’m glad I am needed and have the good health to help those in need. While our home is a hotel, I’ll start each day determined to juggle a little bit better. If you see a ball rolling your way, you’ll know I dropped one!

“There’s going to be World War III!”

Wed, 24 Mar 2010 22:59:25 -0500

My mom used this phrase when any one of her seven children might consider crossing her, especially when her voice was meant to move us all in the right direction, fast. Big time drama!

I’ve recently gotten a case of drama burnout on one of the diabetes forums. Diabetes is dramatic, ok? The latest drama occurred when one forum invited diabetes expert, a Type 1D himself, practicing MD and writer, Dr. Richard Bernstein, to be interviewed. Did I mention he was invited? Physicians, by nature study, reach conclusions and are called upon to issue opinions. Good physicians who have success with their patients are confident in their area of expertise and often train others, write books or do interviews. Nothing too radical about that...unless you stumble into a pocket of people who could not bring themselves to respect the owner of the forum’s decision to do the interview or the one interviewed. Never mind the guidelines that remind us all to be supportive and kind.

Diabetes forums can be a huge battleground. Where some see hope, others see despair. Where someone finds something funny, another cries abuse. The forum topics (threads) are often crowded like a rush hour freeway on a Friday night with seasoned diabetics who have seen it all- to the newbies or newly diagnosed (and everyone in between) who are drawn to something. That something could be support, searching for the best insulins, pumps, needles, glucometers, websites, books or food advise. Some come to shout, to scold, to condemn. We have different IQ's, abilities, resources, personalities and heaven help us, different needs. All are driving at different rates of speed. And sometimes, metaphorically speaking, there are fender benders. Mainly because some people just want to “play chicken.”

Some people with diabetes claim to be experts at their own self management, while others truly are gifted self-managers. Some are smug and critical of other’s choices, BUT push come to shove, will not share one honest shred of information about what they are doing or why their way is so great. Did I mention truth is optional? Another scary side of the forums is a feeling that some really don’t want to see others do well if it means embracing something they don’t like. Others are experts and should be admired and given an ‘attaboy’ or some equally complimentary high five. All have the right to choose their own way in light of past experiences and future goals or lack thereof. I am interested in the successful managers. I love good advice. I’m also interested in those who stumble onto the diabetes forums hoping to find a way to turn around some serious concerns with their diabetes. My heart goes out to them. I was there not too long ago...running for help. There are a lot of people, so a lot of solutions would mean more choices for everyone. That should be a good thing. Diabetes forums exist to provide community and support.

Someone, somewhere has the best diabetes self-care in the world. Right? Someone, somewhere does have the best advise about diabetes, in the world! So, all the angst or polarization is perturbing to me, especially when a few naysayers admit to not reading or studying anything about diabetes. And to them the forum means something much different. I would guess to long time T1’s it is more of a place to tell their stories and perhaps they are not interested in the exchange of ideas or new improvements. They have long ago hit their stride and are happy with it. They just want community. I think those of us who are newer and needy must ruffle their feathers.

In a world where birds of a feather can peck each other to death over a particular plan of diabetes management, it seems time would be better spent affirming those who are doing well in the great chicken coop of life!

And yes, I felt compelled to do a search. Birds can get type 1 diabetes!!! Check out the link if you don’t think it will cause too much drama!: Treating Diabetes in Birds

coffee, my love...

Mon, 18 Jan 2010 18:20:27 -0600

While considering improvements in my diabetes treatment, diet is always first on the list. Going low carb is a no-brainer for me. But what about the peripherals? Coffee, for example. I’ve given up soooo much. Must I mourn this, too?
Ok! Enough drama. When I was diagnosed with Type 1 D, I was recovering from neck and shoulder surgeries, taking many pain medications. Things just would not heal well while having the super high blood sugars. So the combination of the onset of D and the surgeries sent some interesting signals to the medical community. My heart... Yeah, not the one that laughs with my grandchildren or cries with a hurt friend, but the one that is in charge of pumping, lub dub, lub dub and so on. Enter the cardiologist in my life... Many tests, inconclusive results, repeated tests. They have my attention. I’m scared. I’m a bottom line gal, so I asked what I could do? Dr. “Lub Dub” advised me to be at the proper weight and quit caffeine...because after all, your heart, as a machine can only handle so much stress. She also recommended a bowl of oatmeal a day, but I can’t handle the carbs! I forced her to define what number my weight should be and finally came up with her weight. We were identical height and body frames. I needed to be thin. Big surprise on that one. I’m working on it...
Back to the coffee. My trusty google search is enlightening.
The odds of having a stroke may be lower for tea drinkers and coffee drinkers.
That's according to two studies presented today in San Diego at the American Stroke Association's International Stroke Conference 2009.
At least six studies indicate that people who drink coffee on a regular basis are up to 80% less likely to develop Parkinson's, with three showing the more they drink, the lower the risk. Other research shows that compared to not drinking coffee, at least two cups daily can translate to a 25% reduced risk of colon cancer, an 80% drop in liver cirrhosis risk, and nearly half the risk of gallstones.
Admittedly, most benefits are for T2 D’s, but I’d qualify for the reduced tooth decay! I won’t list all the happy news, but even drinking 4 cups a day, on a regular basis, seems to have the greatest results of slowing onset of T2. It can raise BG’s, too, but for me, looking at carbs does that. Chewing sugarless gum raises my BG’s. Come on! Big coffee drinkers also had less incidence of Parkinson’s. My dad suffered with Parkinson’s and was a big lifelong coffee drinker. He gave up smoking when a doctor told him it was wise, but his scale had already been tipped toward strokes, etc. Sorry, Dad. I miss you.
So my personal choice is to drink coffee. It does not carry the evils once thought. What joy. What comfort. And how wise of me! I’ll rest easier at night knowing I’m doing something good for myself. And it will compliment (for some time to come), the case of Torani Sugar Free English Toffee Syrup I received for Christmas from my daughter! Thanks for the thoughtful gift.
My husband just stuck his nose in my screen and offered his medical two cents worth...Coffee, or caffeine is a vitamin, Vitamin J (java)
His prescription...
Strong Java
Disp: 32 ozs.
Sig: 1 cup 4 x daily.
One year refills.

today is NOT tomorrow!

Wed, 13 Jan 2010 00:00:00 -0600

There are big gaps in the education we receive to manage our diabetes. There are gaps in our very own understanding of how to manage year to year, let alone hoping someone in our personal circles get it. But I don't want to diminish what we do have. We have access to diabetes forums and gifted writers and bloggers. I get weary hearing the blame game, too, when diabetes is truly hard to manage. We blame our doctors for not doing enough. We blame the nutritionists for continuing to teach a diet that has too many carbohydrates. CDE’s can be more concerned with their protocols than what is really good for us. Without expecting our doctors, diabetic educators, insurers or researchers to come hold our hands 24/7, we have to fill the gaps ourselves. I'm not a joiner by nature, but when T1 came to visit, I looked for support groups that ended up being geared for T2. Since finding some diabetes forums, I feel less alone. It takes the pressure off family and friends who truly will never get it. (My husband does, in his defense.)

I was deeply troubled by the recent link to a blog and wanted to respond to the writer, but thought better of it. It was written by a wife who completely raises herself up while complaining about/beating down her husband who is a non-compliant type 2 diabetic. I don't expect good health or good relationships to fall in my lap. That said, I hope my family doesn't give up on me in disgust...if I get too depressed to make good choices...if I get a secondary illness that caused a domino effect to undo my good intentions with diabetes. Furthermore this woman gave a young husband advise to put up with(expect nothing) or get out of his young marriage to a non-compliant type 1. Wow. It was harsh. To those who have relationships with family or friends with hard to manage diseases I would say things may be bad and perhaps you can't see a way out, but keep looking! This day will NOT be the same as tomorrow or 10 years from now. No one is stuck (not even the angry wife who blogs), it just looks like it. Doesn’t everyone like to hear about the heroic efforts of someone who has stood by someone in truly hard medical situations? Or do you think these long-suffering types are idiots?

In regard to depression, burn out, diabetes treatment updates or even loneliness, it is too bad there is not an approach/component to managing diabetes like sports psychology does or labor coaches or life coaches. I have to say that to this point, I’ve found few authorities in diabetes who want better for me than I do myself. That’s a sloppy way of saying I’m my best advocate.

But any encouraging word and every avenue of support means the world to me. And that includes my faith in God who provides the greatest Hope in living well on this earth with diabetes.

the holidays and such

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 00:00:00 -0600

There is a world like no other that I often visit. It is the world of diabetes forums. No where else in the world is there an assembly of every age, every walk of life or stage of diabetes. Like so many other ‘neighborhoods,’ greetings of warmth and kindness fill the forum threads this December. You may even get a Christmas greeting private message from a good friend you’ve made on the forums. This is a safe house of sorts for diabetics. A place where you are accepted, and for the most part, understood.
Celebrations having to do with food are a big topic now. To break the rules; to not break the rules. To eat or not to eat, that is the question. Food is hard. Taking insulin is hard, but the alternative is...well, there is no alternative for a Type 1. Some diabetics are planning their vacation from their day in, day out disease. Some view this as a necessary evil to avoid the burnout so common to those who have to manage this relentless foe year upon year. Others counter they would not risk the feeling in their feet or their eye sight for such reckless eating. I’m a bit in the middle of the road. I consider eating too many carbs and a big spike in blood sugars a failure. That’s just me. It is easier to walk away from all temptation than to taste and have an appetite awakened that I cannot control. Such tension while trying to celebrate!
I’d like to set aside the food problem for a minute and tell you what this Christmas means to me. This is a reverently, joyful time to celebrate. I’m a Christian. I love the music, old movies, the get togethers and gift giving. Take away the commercialism and you have a Baby in a manger, born to save us. He brings peace. I don’t want to go through this Christmas without mentioning the Christ child, Jesus.
Here’s to wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a Wonderfully Healthy New Year!

yawn...diabetes awareness month

Fri, 6 Nov 2009 16:38:44 -0600

Subtitle would read: temporarily misplaced my sense of humor. Apparently three years of type 1 diabetes is not long enough to remember that November is Diabetes Awareness Month. An email generated from the ADA reminds me. What do we get for our moment in the sun? Apparently we need a reminder that diabetes is a serious and potentially life-threatening disease. We are reminded of the millions upon millions in the US that live with diabetes.
Reading the promo I find this year’s “bolder...approach” needs us to become involved. Buzz words like share, act and learn invite us to, yes you may well have guessed it, STOP diabetes!
STOP DIABETES conceptualizes the “movement.” On and on. I’ve been feeling cynical lately and a bit irritable toward the ADA. The dietician who trained me while I was still in the hospital being diagnosed with Type 1 was equipped with the ADA guidelines. It was and remains a horrible diet in my opinion. It is horrible in the sense that you eat so many carbohydrates that giving yourself the insulin required often results in under or over dosing. These are dangerous mistakes that can have bad consequences. There were other holes in my education that caused me some angst such as the ADA’s blending of type 1’s and type 2’s talking points. They are very different.
I don’t like to hear myself complain. As a child I was a bit of a Pollyanna. Since college I remained an optimist. My faith in God provides hope that is the medicine on which I most depend. All this to say, I don’t depend on the ADA for support in treating my type 1 Diabetes.
To give the American Diabetes Association it’s due, many forlorn parents of children with T1 and adults counted on their advice for years. At its conception in 1940, the ADA membership included physicians, other health professionals and certain corporations. In 1970 membership was opened to the general population. Being a newcomer to diabetes, I feel no allegiance to the ADA. I would like to see them more pro-tight control, low carb.
I know the general public has little correct knowledge about diabetes. I was there not so long ago. It is what it is.
Diabetes is my way of life. It’s complex, yet doable. While I have a grudge with the ADA, I long for a brilliant advocate of type 1 diabetes to shine a light on it’s problems and inspire researchers for medical innovations, improvements in drugs, devices and correct food management. Sometimes it’s the simplest solutions that carry the greatest improvements. So Happy Diabetes Awareness Month!
To celebrate, I’ll share Neil Greathouse’s latest YouTube offering. I found him at a time when I was coming out of the stunned phase having learned I had type 1. The Betes Part 6. Don’t forget to look up Parts 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5, too!
Happy Thanksgiving!

diabetes expo vs sunshiny day

Sat, 24 Oct 2009 17:43:09 -0500

Having lived through last week I was ambivalent about my plans to meet up with some Diabetes Daily acquaintances at the Minneapolis Diabetes EXPO . The sun was shining, after all. I dragged myself around and got ready, telling myself I would decide whether to go after I finished getting ready. It’s a complicated thing being me! Matt returned from errands and we headed for Minneapolis. Diabetes EXPO here we come!
I didn’t feel the same excitement/horror (no, horror is NOT too strong a word) I’d had three years ago at my first D Expo. Type 1 D had only been with me for one month. My eyes were wide open. I saw every walking cane for the blind, all manner of wheel chair accommodating every size and shape of amputee or other degree of lameness. I saw people standing in line to have their blood tested, clamoring for freebees and I saw the faces of family and friends who accompanied their pancreatic-ly challenged loved ones. Not too much had changed this time, except the horror had turned to mourning.
I recognized something new this time, however. People. Many people came to find a specific answer for their predicament: better walking stick, scooter, meter, pump, diet, insurance, test strip, you name it! And I heard comments: How old does my son have to be to be on a pump? Can I hold it? What is CGMS? How old do you have to be for that? Oh, I don’t know if Billie could handle that...can I see it again? Can you imagine parents trying to figure out the best path for their child with diabetes? It is intense. Or- a very thin twenty something man accompanied with no less than three multigenerational women behind him looking at meters: the rep asked how often he checked his BG. Answer, never. He didn’t own a meter. Wow. How I wish he’d take my glucometer! You know what the women in his life were hoping for- a diabetic rebirth of some sort.
It seemed there were fewer vendors and definitely fewer freebees this year. Perhaps it is a sign of the times. We did run into one person from our monthly Twin City Meetups. I had fun chatting with the Rep from Medtronic who did my CGMS training. I ran into my Endocrinologist. (he did a Q&A session). BMOC! He was surprised to see me because of previous comments I’d made regarding ADA nutritional guidelines. He remembered rightly and I explained my mission to meet some people. He thanked me for sending a patient to him. I was glad it worked out.
My goal to find people from Diabetes Daily was a bust for the most part. And when we left a few short hours after arriving, it was cloudy. The sun was gone.
The moral of this story? Diabetes is a horrific disease, but there is a tremendous body of work that is represented in the form of the Minneapolis Diabetes EXPO to give hope to those who seek it. It is not an easy road. Many today are enjoying lives lived well with diabetes. No complications. Some are not. I think the EXPO has something for everyone. I came away with what I needed.

things that come in threes

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 18:11:58 -0500

Things that come in threes: here is a little list to get us started.
Faith, Hope and Love.
Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!
Rings in a binder
The Three Stooges
Little Piggies
3 Dog Night
Triangles
Musketeers
Bad News

Today I have come under the spell of threes. Last week I had two MRIs. The phone rings this morning with an ill-equipped caller who tells me I need cervical spine surgery and please to call a surgeon. She didn’t have the diagnosis in front of her to enlighten me. What about the shoulder MRI? After shuffling papers she found results that showed a shoulder tear, not rotator cuff, but it would require a repair and a call to yet another surgeon. She would send me a list of referrals. Among them was an ankle and foot orthopedist. I won’t be calling them, but it casts a doubt on the seriousness of the rest of the list. Wouldn’t you think?

That’s one and two. Three. I’m recovering from H1N1. It’s a mild case, but it is still here and didn’t help the emotions of the day.

I have to say there were tears of frustrations with my morning phone call. I’ve already had a cervical spine fusion a short three years ago. A month later I had shoulder impingement surgery, while still wearing my cute neck brace. A month later I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. But I digress.

Back to my tale of woes. I was teary, shaky, forlorn and stunned. I decided to check my blood glucose. It’s 56. Well, of course it is! No vacation from diabetes. I had some peanut butter and high fiber crackers.

I don’t have the full reports, so I have some hope the caller was overstating the findings. The shoulder seems more pressing. I was hoping it was a frozen shoulder and a little physical therapy to take care of everything. My sister reminded me of a tussle I had with a couple horses and that might have done the deed.

This is not the worst news, but it is my news. H1N1 has been light, so far. And tomorrow is a new day.

Shoulders, Cervical Spines and Flu, Oh My!